Accident?

Well, I finally did it.

I'm sixty years old, have been driving since I was 18, and never had an accident.

Until today.

5:45 AM and, for all the time I've driven with more alcohol in me than preferred by most state legislatures, more sober than I've been since high school.

Hit the curb at 40 MPH or so while southbound at Third and Wyandotte / Rte 378.

It was immediately obvious that something catastrophic had occurred so I stopped in the middle of relatively heavy traffic.

Reached in my pocket for the cell phone that I bought SPECIFICALLY TO CALL FOR HELP IN AN EMERGENCY... and there it wasn't.

Had another cell phone without service and, as I was in the middle of a very busy road, decided a call to 911 was in order.

The police came and had me pull into the parking lot of the Cathedral Church of the Nativity and called AAA for me.

I said I didn't know where I was going to have it towed as I probably can't afford to fix it until payday (Friday) and my garage has no parking capacity to leave a vehicle.

The officer said they'd probably just put on the spare.

The spare... Took a while to sink in.

The SPARE! THE SPARE TIRE!!

I don't handle emergency situations well...

At any rate, AAA arrived within the hour and I was on my way.

As no one was hurt and no other cars were involved and no damage to the City of Bethlehem occurred, and no claim to the insurance company will be made, I thought that maybe - as it was a victim-less crime, as it were, it shouldn't even count as an accident.

But the alternative would be some smart ass asking, "You mean, you did it on purpose?!"

Oh well, if I had to draw from the Car Accident deck in the Great Game of Life, I guess I got off easy.